"I Want a Hypothalamus for Christmas"

Here's another song I hate. I am so friggin' glad I'm as clever as I am, or I would have to suffer with the originals all season long.

I Want a Hypothalamus for Christmas

I want a hypothalamus for Christmas
Only a hypothalamus will do
Don't want a cerebellum, no cerebral cortex
I want a hypothalamus to regulate blood pressure and fat

I want a hypothalamus for Christmas
I don't think Santa Claus will mind, do you?
He won't have to use a dirty scalpel too
Just shove it through my nasal cavity
that's the easy thing to do

I can see me now on Christmas morning,
creeping to the tree
Oh what joy and what surprise
When I open up my eyes
to find a hypothalamus to attach to my pituitary

I want a hypothalamus for Christmas
Only a hypothalamus will do
No frontal lobe, no medulla oblongata
Just a hypothalamus
It’s the only thing I want-a

(Short Music Interlude)

Mom says the hypothalamus would help me read, but then
I found out the hypothalamus controls a different region

(Short Music Interlude)

There's lots of room for it right between my ears
Just above my brain stem, right between the hemispheres

I can see me now on Christmas morning,
creeping to the tree
Oh what joy and what surprise
When I open up my eyes
to find a hypothalamus to attach to my pituitary

I want a hypothalamus for Christmas
Only a hypothalamus will do
No occipital lobe or left or right thalamuseses
I only like hypothalamuseses
And hypothalamuses like me too!


Thomas Robertson II © 2009